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Jason and the Chriamon

A myth submitted to the site by Euan Tseng

Athens, Ancient Greece

In 650 BC in Ancient Greece, there was a pleasant and beauty-loving city called Athens. It was a scorching and boiling day and people were buying rancid smelling sardines and salty smelling olives. One red-faced shopkeeper was ferociously arguing with a shaken-up costumer about how much some wool would cost. A huge statue of Demeter, which was covered with olive oil fragrance like somebody had bathed it in olive oil, was towering over the agora. There were people standing in the agora talking away happily. Two women slaves, who had amphorae on their heads, were talking about how their master was really kind to them. One even said “You know, my master has given me one whole month of rest! He said I can do whatever I want!” Other people were yelling, “Come and buy delicious and grains! They are freshly harvested and washed for you!” One of the butchers was sharpening his knife to chop meat. People all around the agora were mumbling and chatting. There was Ancient Greek writing on the amphorae people had. People were shaking silver round drachmas in their hands, trying to decide what to buy first. Everybody was wearing Greek chitons and leather sandals, the normal outfit for a citizen of Athens and all of Greece. People were also praying to the oracle, asking the priestess what their future would be like. One child was playing with a shopkeeper’s abacus, which made the shopkeeper very furious. But nobody knew about the terror on its way…

The Chriamon was the most deadly and horrible monster in the whole of Ancient Greece. It was even more powerful then the gods. It had the head of an eagle, body of a cat and tail of a trident. It was a monster child of Poseidon. It once had been a peaceful monster that guarded the doors of Poseidon’s court. But since Poseidon was angry at the people of Athens because they had lost a war, it started to grow evil too. Its footsteps were as loud as Zeus’ roar. It had a body as immense as Laistrygonian giants. The smell of the Chriamon was a filthy piece of rotten and grotesque meat that had been left in the sun for eighty years. Its teeth were short sharp knifes that has been covered in poison. Its brain, however, was an intelligent owl. It was thirty times bigger than a Cyclops. The round dark eyes could paralyse you completely with fear.

When the monster stormed into Athens with Poseidon on its back, people shouted, “Oh gods, it is the great god Poseidon!” Although some people stood there like a statue, amazed by Poseidon, a wave of terror washed over the other villagers. People started going crazy. One man ran up to the acropolis and went running in the air as he fell down. Another ran into a row of colonnades and knocked himself out. A soldier, who was holding Greek fire and when he was about to throw it at Chriamon, slipped on a banana skin and dropped the Greek fire and burned his leg.
“Show yourself soldiers, let me blast you to pieces!” yelled Poseidon. As Chriamon ran to the Parthenon, he wanted to blast Athena’s statue to ashes, but he didn’t manage that. Athena was furious, so she sent a shower of olive trees down on Chriamon, which nearly made his bones crack to pieces. One woman was so frantic that she ran off a cliff and smashed the trees in the forest beneath. Another woman was so sad that she threw her baby at the monster. One person held up a pretend Aegis, but got smacked away. Arms and legs were flying through the air; rivers of blood streamed the dirt on the floor. People were very frightened, so they prayed to the gods, but nothing happened. People screamed in terror, as the monster engulfed the city to ashes. The once beautiful and cultural city of Athens was now destroyed and abandoned…

The survivors of the destruction of Athens all wanted retribution because their city was destroyed. The government sent messengers all over Athens to look for a hero to kill the monster, but none of them replied. A demigod son of Zeus called Jason, who had been kicked out of Mount Olympus because he was naughty, wanted to seek out the monster and kill it. He only wanted to kill it because he wanted to go back to Olympus to meet his father. So he went off to the court of Athens. As Jason, who was dressed in full battle armor, marched through the city, the people thought he was an enemy, so they simply escaped Athens as fast as they could. As Jason went into the court, he announced, “I want to be the hero who defeats the monster. I’m Jason, son of the king of the gods, ZEUS!”
“What! A silly old brat came to be the hero, and said he was son of Zeus! This is TOO funny!” laughed the tyrant.
“Then why am I wearing battle armor that has the symbol of Olympus on here!” yelled Jason. Then he turned his back on the tyrant to let him see the symbol Ω.
“If you don’t believe me, be careful I zap you with my spear!” shouted Jason. His shouting was so loud the whole room shook. He held up his spear and got ready to strike.
” I swear upon River Styx that I, Jason will save the city and return to the city alive” bellowed Jason.
“Okay, okay. You little nonsense brat can save Athens duh!” complained the tyrant.
“I will go at once!” screamed Jason.

So off Jason went to destroy Chriamon. He walked a long way to the sea. He prayed to Poseidon, god of the sea, who told him that nobody would honour him. Then, out of nowhere, Chriamon charged at Jason. But Jason just simply deflected the blow with his shield. Chriamon disappeared. Jason held up his electric spear, ready to strike. Chriamon charged again. It nearly took off Jason’s foot, but Jason leapt up and zapped the monster. It hit Chriamon square in the chest. But it got up. Jason threw his celestial bronze javelin at Chriamon. When it hit Chriamon, it shattered to pieces. But Chriamon had fallen down on the floor trembling. But it got up and took his position to fight. Jason zapped at it. “Kill you, you ugly little bucket!” insulted Jason.
“Squawk!” screamed Chriamon. Poseidon appeared on Chriamon’s back.
He shouted, “I don’t care about Athens, they lost a war! And thy father sent THEE to defeat MY monster?”
“Yes, my father sent me to crush Chriamon to pieces!” declared Jason. Then Chriamon and Jason went to fight. As Jason raised his electricity spear, Poseidon vanished. When Jason struck, Poseidon appeared on the sand, holding his trident. Chriamon and Poseidon together plunged at Jason. Jason zapped again and again, but Chriamon and Poseidon were too quick.
They dodged again and again until they heard, “Jason, kill him!” Zeus bellowed in Jason’s mind. Jason knew he had to kill Chriamon. When Chriamon lunged again, he stabbed at Chriamon. Unfortunately, he missed and fell on the ground, he looked up. He had a dazed look on his face. Then as the angry look returned to Jason’s face, he charged. As he charged, a faint aura of blue fire flickered around him. It was the blessing of Zeus! When Jason stabbed, Chriamon managed to choke out one last word” Argh!!!” Then exploded into dust.

When the people heard that Athens was saved, the people who had fled the city returned screaming, “Hooray!!!” They were planning to hold a symposium the next day, but Jason secretly escaped back to Olympus. The next day, all the gods held a symposium on Mount Olympus. The gods came to the symposium wearing colourful chitons. As Jason walked past, the gods clapped him on his back.
The acrobat god was doing acrobats on the marble stone bench. Dionysus was busy walking around drinking wine and holding hands with a beautiful woman. That was Ariadne. Athena and Ares were practising their fighting skills. Apollo and Artemis were together arguing about something which looked a lot like shooting skills with bows and arrows. Poseidon was happily talking with Zeus and when he talked, he blushed as if he were ashamed. Demeter was sitting on a table eating oats with another goddess which looked like Hera. Hephaestus was looking bored and was banging metal to make a “Jason” statue. Hermes was flying with his flying sandals and doing tricks in the air, while Aphrodite put lipstick onto her lips. Jason stood up and said, “I need to go.” All the people fell silent. “I want to go on another quest.”
“Okay!” said Zeus.

Then off Jason went on another quest. But Olympians did not forget him. They built a temple dedicated to him at the side of the palace, and let him protect Olympus forever.

By Euan Tseng
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